Monday, April 25, 2011

Bedtime Lectures

I just got reprimanded by my kid. Not sure if I deserved it or not, but one thing is very clear... I'm completely out of my league in this house when it comes to verbal sparring.

Kyle got in trouble for spitting on another kid today at school.

Both Christina and I talked with him about it earlier today, but I thought I would use a bedtime story as a way to really drill home the fact that spitting is gross and that we shouldn't spit on people.

Every night Kyle sets the parameters for his story and then I make one up as I'm telling him (fun for him and sort of a creative exercise for me). Anyway, tonight he requested a story about a video game that he likes to play. So, I wove a story about how the main character in the game got in an argument with his friend and spit on him, and then nobody wanted to play with him anymore, and he was sad and lonely.

So, towards the end of the story Kyle stops me and says...

Kyle: Excuse me Daddy. Why are we talking about spitting?

Me: That's just how this story goes.

Kyle: Yeah, but there's no spitting in the video game. So, why are you trying to tell me a story about spitting? Is it because I spit on my friend today?

Me: What do you think?

Kyle: I think you don't need to do that. I already learned my lesson from Mommy on the way home from school today. This just makes me feel bad. And you're not supposed to do this with bedtime stories. Bedtime stories are supposed to be fun.

Me: ... Uh... Okay, let's just snuggle.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Parenting Warrior

Feeling like a warrior today. I'm a parental Samurai trained in the art of time-outs. Keep your hands and feet to yourself and everything will be alright.

Verbal Dream State

My mom used to say some pretty bizarre stuff if you started talking to her just before she fell asleep - sort of a verbal dream state. Tonight I started falling asleep while telling my son a bedtime story and did the same thing. Not sure exactly what I said, but something about Darth Vader, a beach ball, and some angry lady. Kyle seemed a little confused/freaked out when I finally snapped out of it. Hahaha.

My brother, Shea, and my mom would watch TV together and just when my mom's eyes were closing he wold turn to her and say something like...

Shea: Mom, can I have a bagel dog?

Mom: No, the dog needs a hat.

Shea: Oh, okay, what hat should I get for him?

Mom: The red one... no green... It's in the bathroom

Shea: What's in the bathroom?

Mom: They are. All of them... All those guys.

Shea: What guys?

Mom: Huh?

And so on and so on. LOL!